Words.technology


Burning man 2007: the Green Man: FRIDAY

Ooops, it seems that I confused some notes and dates, my thursday day report included also much of Friday’s day report… but this doesn’t really affect the story that much as we can now skip to the more juicy bits.

So, Friday night was upon me, now every year I’ve been, Friday is the peak. Everyone is out at night, a huge amount of art projects are done, the vibe is buzzing, the options for entertainment are vast.

Ooops, it seems that I confused some notes and dates, my thursday day report included also much of Friday’s day report… but this doesn’t really affect the story that much as we can now skip to the more juicy bits.

So, Friday night was upon me, now every year I’ve been, Friday is the peak. Everyone is out at night, a huge amount of art projects are done, the vibe is buzzing, the options for entertainment are vast.

My tail had broken again, except this time it’s the power-pack that vanished… so even if i wanted to repair it, this was now impossible. In a way, I saw this as a blessing, cause walking around with a tail is such a hassle. So instead I stuffed my raz-head into my backpack and turned it on. This had the effect of having it translucently glow from inside of my bag, while half of it protruded out and the tongue hanged backwards. I have no idea what this looked like, it might have looked like I was a big insect with curled in wings… I also attached a red light to my necklace, and another red light to my water bottle which I held around my torso like a bow-n-arrow. I attached some plastic leaves and flowers to my pants, adorned my beautiful blue-white sweater [zipped open most of the time so I was bare chested] and put on sneakers for the night. This made me feel very mobile and beautiful at the same time. The red lights along my front were perfect as I could place them over my heart and throat chakra, or over my chest as I felt fit.

For this night I had aquired some liquid acidics. Now after wednesday and the last couple of days I was initially a bit hesitant to go out-all out tonight… but really: am I going to let a bad couple of days ruin my burning man? I don’t think so!

I soared into the night, the stars were out and the moon was hiding, people were everywhere in massive quantities. There was activity everywhere, every direction I looked, something amazing was going on. The streets were full of lights, a double spinning tree twirled green swirls, a dozen flame throwing cannons over a vast area echoed patterns of audio and visual delight, the sea of space was open before me – i was excited.

I approached a giant mammoth that was made of steel with cages hanging from all sides and half naked women dancing inside of it. There were several art cars all parked around here, many of them with their own sound systems and spontaneous crowds.

I felt the magic cookie [this is what the liquid was placed upon for storage/consumption purposes] coming on, so I had to sit down for a second. A girl cae next to me and we chit-chatted for a bit about trivial things; then she ran off and started makign out with one of the girl in the cage as I circled around to check out some of the other going-ons here.

Then, as I got to this one music-system, I felt the presence of another wizard. Just as I felt this, I turned around and there, in the flesh was Richard!!! Richard from New Zealand; the guy whome I road tripped with for over a month and who then disapeared to go – I have no idea where in the world – poof – Richard. What the fk!?!? What is he doign here [what am I doing here too! for that matter]. When I saw him I was like,… “Richard…? Richard!!!” I grabbed his for arms and started to jump in a circle laughing! He did the same, we were just jumping up and down spinning in a circle a good half dozen of times giggling!! how crazy to bump into someone I know, in the middle of this vast desert! Magic! He certainly looked like a wizard of some sorts; his composer was good, I felt sweetness from him – I hoped he was doing better than before.

At this point I needed to sit down again, which I mentioned to Richard; he took it as a sign that I wanted to go on; Which made me think maybe he wanted to be on his own; so next thing I knew, I was on my own again… smiling though, who would have thought?

My vision moves from waves of bluryness to sharp fracteline precision, I roam the playa from beautiful artwork to beautiful artwork. I remember the circus shows at 9 o’clock and esplanade from last year and head there for a look. It’s very packed, the stage is full of erotic dancing women with fire fingers doing some of the most amazing [and super sexual] patterns you can imagine. At this point I start glowing, I head to some Japanese art car and listen to the music, dump my bike at some strange looking tent and walk in. Inside there is a fountain and what looks amazingly like a brothel. I don’t dare approach anyone, I’m more a fly on the wall, but there are strange looking things going on in the corners of the room.

Then I enter a cinema, I’m handed some popcorn, I have a seat and they start playing this really weird version of Flash Gorden; except the whole movie has been mutated and recut in most interesting ways. Here is where I have one of my first of what would surmount to be an uncountable amount of new physical experiences. Effortlessly I dip into a state of peace and silence, every tip of my body is activated – my toes and fingers feel lots of energy and then ‘woosh’ I feel the onset of what can best be described as an orgasm; except that its not centered on my sexual organs, instead its my entire body that feels it – a body-orgasm. I have about 3 in the theater as well as a piercing moment where I could stare straight into the fabric of space-time, and then I head out, with my popcorn in hand.

Already at this point I start to feel insect like. Or rather some kind of combination between a magician, a king and an insect [more like a praying mantis]. I felt as if I was one of the rare privileged few in the universe – and this whole event was my party. A massive celebration put on for my pleasure and enjoyment. And it really was! I mean moment after moment the entire evening I’d walk somewhere, everyone arround me would say “wow thats beautiful”, “amazing”, “wow” and then I’d move on, look at the next amazing thing, think to myself “wow thats beautiful” and then the next person would say [to themselves or their friends]: “wow thats beautiful”… over and over again, meanwhile I’d be having deep meditative experiences continuously and eventually also one body orgasm per location I went to – it was incredible, I can’t even fathom how to describe it properly.

The thing is, a large part of this experience was also related to the telepathic aspects of LSD. It was on this night that I felt I made a new breakthrough in my understanding of telepathy, death and the collective unconsciousness. But to explain this properly, I also need to get back to my stomach, and the 2nd chakra.

They say the 2nd chakra is our emotional self. Now I knew already for some time that this is currently my most problematic chakra. Historically I’ve stored stress here since I was young, and later in life when stress was felt in the mind I would place it in my stomach. I was feeling stress these last few days here again, and so I was again confronted with my patterns of behavior… why the stress? Why the second chakra?

Well, the more I thought about it, the more everything clicked together. The 2nd chakra represents pleasure [side note: my spanking came up on “pleasure”]. In many ways by me persueing infatuations with women who had previously rejected me, I was denying my own pleasure. As with previous years, I found myself picking up lots of other people’s m.o.o.p. [mater out of place] aka trash at the event – and at this point I said to myself: “sebastian, stop picking up other people’s moop!” – “enjoy!”

I think I’ve always been more on the work-aholic side of things, I’m someone who needs to remind myself to relax and enjoy life, instead of taking thigns so seriously all the time.

Another relation to the 2nd chakra was naval. I was focusing on the feeling in my stomach while I was tripping, and trying to detect what that feeling actually is… I got this image of an umbilical chord… this feeling of center of energy, or of the material connection. Now I can tell you that floating in a country and not knowing where you are currently living, how long you are traveling, or where home is [other than between the ears] can be a bit of a strain on one’s concepts. Again, another 2nd chakra pressure.

What I did on this evening was totally relax into things. I was one with grace. On Tuesday when I channeled Raz, I had this conversation with him in which Raz told me that he was a higher entity of myself; a star traveler on a long lonely journey through space to understand the universe and Sebastian was but one of the alien species he had discovered. My life, to him, is/was but one moment within his greater lifetime – or rather one incarnation along his journey. A rather bizarre imaginative story to follow.

On Wednesday when I was the doped out dino, my experience brought me close to the feelings of telepathy and death – as the two seemed very closely knit.

What I experienced on Wednesday was the following: If you take any moment and pretend that you die in that moment – then suddenly the ego is gone and the only thing which exsists is the environment. However the environment that you are currently located in is not coincidental, it is something into which you have both drawn yourself into; and something which has drawn you into it.

As a creationist I believe that every moment of every conversation/event that you hear and see is in your life because it is a reflection of your own inner world. There is no separation between the outer and inner world. So when someone says something to someone else and you over hear them; that conversation is also something that is taking place within you. There is no chance, only choice – but that choice is completely free; here is where words become confusing and the logic seems to contradict itself.

For I believe that at the center of everything lies not a point [or a string or any other kind of geometry], but consciousness. Conscious is by definition self-ruling and thus by definition unpredictable. if consciousness could be predictable then it would no longer be consciously aware because you could define it. It’s easy for me to brush this one over, but its a very important assumption I am making/drawing which is a building block for a lot of other understanding into the nature of reality I am now refining.

The universe-experience is one of duality. You can’t create anything without creating its opposite. If this is true of all aspects of the universe, then logically this would also be true of consciousness itself. For there to be a sense of uniqueness/individuality; then it must imply that there is also oneness/absolution. And if oneness exists; then it must be infinite; and if it is infinite and it exsists then it also implies that it exists in the present; all around you, right now in this very moment [and all moments] – you are just not aware of it right now; you are focussed on this very particular specific experience.

On Wednesday I was able to use my imagination to explore the world of death at any particular moment in time. So when I would approach a situation, I could sense the feelings that were present in myself and thus reflected in my surroundings. This ever present oneness is the collective unconsciousness. The collective unconsciousness is not the collective HUMAN unconsciousness, but more of a universal collective unconsciousness. However, because humans represent a particular ‘frequency’ of consciousness that we currently relate with most intuitively it is true that most collective unconscious interactions tend to be focussed via other human entities.

Naturally all humans are also unique, and we are all gifted with freewill. There fore the way the system works is nested. You have the personal level, where people form their own reality, this sends out messages to the universe which attract and repulse other self-aware; self-governing entities into it. Between us all we radiate collective unconscious thought; most of which is unconscious and so intuitive its ignored, and operate oon individual levels directly.

This might sound far fetched, but really our bodies are just as seemingly foreign to us as our environmental interactions are; and yet we take this ‘unknown’ as a ‘given’ and do not really consider its implications very strongly either. The body amazingly reflects and interacts with us as a means to exist in this reality; and yet it operates relatively autonomously from our conscious-ego.

The biggest challenge I had Wednesday was deciphering between ego thoughts, and telepathic thoughts, for without experience the two can seem identical and ego thoughts can easily become projected as collective ones.

So on Friday all of this not only made sense, but I was able to also communicate now directly back with the collective unconsciousness in interesting ways. There were at least two moments when I was meditating, the first time was at a giant boat where people were dancing beautiful poses and I could feel the minds of all the people on the boat looking onto me [i was the only spectator and I sat down with my popcorn to see what they were going to do].

As I felt their minds probing me with questions I said to myself “If you wish to look, I have nothing to hide” and let them in to me fully; at that moment I also thought to myself, what is it I can give you instead? Do you need something? And then in flash it felt like I could enter into the deepest part of every person in that area and heal them. Now I can’t tell you for sure how much of this is real; it will forever remain a highly personal experience that I can never prove to anyone beyond my word, but several people in that room/area started to say words like “thank you god” and “jesus christ” and 2 people took my picture, I was in lotus position at the time. It is true, for a moment I felt like I was a saint, everything drifted away and I could heal others effortlessly. This event took place at least one other time at the entrance to a nightclub area where people again were calling me a savior in their own tongues. Quite the experience.

After the dancing boat ship, I walked behind the streets of the festival before cutting back into the playa; I felt electric, my body was in prefect communion with my mind. My fingers and toes were energized; the bycicle and me were one, I danced on the bicycle, I would hold positions with my lights and create art of my every motion and being. and then I considered art.

What is art? The answer came to me instantly. We all tend to think that art is the most useless creation of man; that thing that hold no purpose other than for a new thought; but then I knew this was not true at all; the reverse was true. for if you take a persons life, and you look at it from start to finish; what was that life really about? What does that unique life, that will never occure again in exactly the same way forever and every, really mean in the totality of the universe? That life WAS art. Life IS art. We are all works of art pieces, created by ourselves. And here I was at a place where art is everything; it really felt to me like Burningman is not only a place where you can see a lot of art, its a place where you can become art as you all collectily create a beautiful living art piece. Now thats something incredibly special; because while all life is art; most of the time we are all following some larger-art-in-progress = culture or society; while in parallel developing our own art-lives. That freedom of expression that Burning Man provides is an oppertunity to become the most of what you already contain.

Radical self expression.
Radical self reliance.

I repeated these two words to myself over and over… what does this mean?

Shoot, I have to go, there is a lot to still cover for friday – so I will publish this entry now and hopefully another entry before I go to my permaculture course; but if not; then the next blog entry will be after the 24th of September some time when I am back from the Symbiosis festival!

All the best to you, my collective friends…
😉

[no I am not crazy, at least, not by my standards, still the same old seb! just a little wiser every day; hehe]

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